SIPPIN ON PURPLE, FOLKS

So, like I said, big site stuff.

The Purple Drank got called up to the big leagues: from now on, I'll be posting at sippinonpurple.com and I'd really appreciate it if all you guys followed me over.  I'm really excited about joining SBNation, which is pretty much the best thing around nowadays, so, seriously, check it out, update your bookmarks and do whatever it is you people need to do. Just follow me over, because the stuff I do is just going to get better. But I can only make it so good on my own - the great thing about SBNation is that the blogs are pretty much community based. So all y'all gotta chip in. 

 

Everybody who's been reading here, thanks very much for your support. 

The Purple Drank

Born June 2009

Died September, 2009

You will be missed, but your memory will live on through my constant southern hip-hop references on the new site. 

R.I.P.

Monday Stuff

So, yeah, like I said, BIG THINGS POPPIN on this site in the next few days. So keep your eyes out, keep coming back. Here's just a short post:

• As you probably done heard, NU landed a serious basketball prospect, for the first time in the history of Northwestern sports. Jershon Cobb, a 4-star recruit from Atlanta, committed to the Wildcats yesterday. Cobb is one of several elite prospects from who were contemplating NU, and the first to commit. (the rest are in the class of 2011, Cobb is 2010.) (By the way, if we land 1/5 of the guys we're in the running for in 2011, it will be hands-down the best class in NU history. It's that good. We're recruiting two five-star players in the top 20 rankings nationally. Yeah, poop your pants, folks.) I personally am ecstatic, as noted, basketball is my sport, so this definitely dampens the football thing. Tavaras Hardy has done absolute wonders for Northwestern as a recruiter - Carmody's weakness at NU has always been his utter inability to handle recruiting. And if he has actual tourney-level talent on his team, thanks to Hardy, he might actually turn into a successful basketball coach. 'Cuse loss aside, it's a good time to be an NU sports fan. By the time I graduate from this school in June 2012, Northwestern will have gone to an NCAA tournament. Book it. 
• New poll up - can we be a little less homer-y this time? (That being said, I'm voting NU.)
• I realized what went wrong on saturday: when Ryan Lichtenstein, Syracuse's nervous freshman kicker, was getting prepared to take the biggest field goal of his life, NU should've sent redshirt freshman defensive tackle Evan Luxenburg over to the Syracuse sidelines to engage Lichtenstein in conversation about what its like to have last names that really sound like small European nations, but were slightly misspelled in some way. He could've started calling him bro right off the bat, even though they've never met, and discussed how people always spell his name like the country, and he always has to correct them, and then asked him if he has the same problem, and, bro - we're bros, right - it's so annoying, right? What language to they speak in Liechtenstein anyway? German? Yeah, something like that, I don't even know. Less people have probably heard of Liechtenstein than Luxembourg, so you probably don't run into that problem a lot, though, right bro? Bro? Oh, you're about to kick a field goal, it's cool, go ahead we're bros, just don't tell your teammates about our "bros whose names sound a lot like small European nations beginning with the letter L" club, cuz they'll get angry at us. Oh, what's that, I'm getting in your head? You're about to shank the field goal? 
• The fact that I typed all of that isn't a good sign for my mental health. But it totally would've worked.

So yeah, keep it locked and loaded here, as noted, big things are popping. Names of the week tomorrow, and I promise that Minnesota has the best damn names of any football team in the country. 

Guhhhhhhhhhhh: the recap.

It appears our plans of getting the easiest four out of conference opponents possible so we're 4-0 in our non-conference slate, has, uh, backfired.

Crap.

I admit, I have to take some of the blame: the lack of preview posts this week is pretty much the only difference I can think of between this week's loss and the wins in the first two weeks. I'll get on it this week.

First off, thanks to everybody who commented last night. I, sadly, didn't comment as much as I should've because my iPhone reception was spotty where I was, but, this will change next week. Trust me. Big things poppin around here.

This was an extraordinarily frustrating team. I'm not going to say we were the better team, because we weren't, but it was a very winnable game, and about 40 little things we should've done made it a loss. 

Mike Kafka. The man played pretty much the best game I've ever seen from a college quarterback... except for one throw, at the exact worst time he possibly could've thrown that one throw. Look at his stats before his final throw of the game: 35-41 passing, 390 yards, 3 touchdowns, no interceptions, 5 sacks for -37 yards, then 8 rushes for 30 yards and a touchdown, and one reception for 24 yards and a touchdown. 

Unfortunately, his stats turned out to be 35-42 with 3 touchdowns and an interception. Which came on the last drive of the game. Tragic, considering how great a game he had, that he's the goat. When after an entire game of beautiful precision passes for short yardage and the occasional strike downfield to receivers that just happened to find a seam in the defense - the man completed his first 16 freaking passes - and he proved he could run after a long hiatus where he refused to, and even more exciting, he showed his ability to do the Mike Vick in Madden 2004 play, which is running towards the line of scrimmage, forcing any linebacker and cornerback to cheat up a little bit and try and keep him from busting out a 40 yard run, and then dropping a pass to the receiver inevitably left open by that cheating up. However, all this is forgotten, as he threw a pick that ended NU's chances of winning the game in regulation, and pretty much sealed the loss. 

Also, he needs to learn how to take a sack and not fumble, though. Desperately. That first play from scrimmage on offense really cost us the game.

Defense. Most football teams try to have one, but Northwestern has made a controversial decision not to have one this year, after an offseason of talking about how great our defense would be, no less. Yeah, I know two of our top four cornerbacks were injured and something called a Demetrius Dugar was left to cover Mike Williams, one of the best receivers in the country, at times, and David Nwabuisi replaced a proven linebacker in Nate Williams (and played pretty well, to be honest), but this was an abhorrent defensive effort. First off, Greg Paulus had our defense on SKATES. He pump faked, everybody bit. He faked a handoff, hey, everybody bit again. He ran a few yards towards scrimmage, hey, everybody's pretending the guy they should cover doesn't exist and just leaving that mofo as wide open as humanly possible. Whenever NU defenders had a choice to make, it seemed like they always, always made the wrong one.

Kicking. Earlier, I wrote a post about NU kickers, and how poorly timed NU's missed PAT's are.

Demos and Villarreal have combined to miss four extra points in the past two years. Not a lot, considering how many opportunities they have to shank them. Well, I'm proud to report that of five games Northwestern has lost in the past two years, three prominently feature missed extra points, and two - this one, and the Alamo Bowl last year - would have been Northwestern victories in all likelihood if not for shank jobs.

It's so frustrating. Demos nailed a game-winning 49-yarder last week, with enough juice on it to be a 55-yarder. This week, a 19-yarder essentially cost Northwestern the game. WHY CAN'T YOU MISS THESE WHEN WE'RE BEATING TOWSON BY 40?

Jacob Schmidt and Arby Fields actually played decently, especially Schmidt. But it's pretty freaking disappointing that the injury bug hit so hard at running back, where we needed some sort of spark just for an extra few yards here or there.

Great game by our receiving corps. Demetrius Fields had pretty much the only drop, and they were pretty much always open. Our superback corps looks like a talented unit, and if they can play like this, I'll be pumped.

I was so glad to see the Brewer pass, because I knew it had to happen eventually, after how we used Eric Peterman last year. That play can be devastating week after week. Worst comes to worst, it's just a screen to Brewer for a few yards. Best comes to best, it looks like it did yesterday.

The playcalling was a lot better this week, so that's good. We ran an actual offensive gameplan. That's good.

Basically, if we get healthy and our defense is half as good as it was supposed to be in the preseason, this team can still make a minor bowl. But it's looking bleak. Really bleak. Memphis Bleek. 

We have Minnesota next week. I highly suggest you keep coming back to the site, because really, really, really cool things are going to happen in the next week. No hints, but, really cool things. 

Game Thread: Northwestern @ Syracuse.

So 34 of you voted you thought NU would win, and one of you thinks Syracuse will win. I have a feeling the game will be closer.

Anyway, here's how it works: comment, and I'll talk to you. Last week, Patrick played along, this week, very few of you are at the game because its in Syracuse, so, please, play along. Should be good. 

Go Cats, yo. 

Brendan Smith Memorial Picks, Week 3.

Normally, I do major preview posts on NU's games - not this week, it's been hectic, so, nah. Sorry about that. Without further ado, here are your Big Ten/NU picks.

11 AM: Eastern Michigan @ No. 25 Michigan.

Watching EMU lose by 30 to Michigan will be tough for NU fans. It's like watching your friend hook up with a girl you thought you had a chance with, except it's really not like that at all, because its a football game.

Pick: Michigan.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: I'm telling you, eagles have the tactical advantage against pretty any land mammal, except for, like bears, and elephants, and other stuff like that. They got wings and talons. Trust me on this one. EMU wins their second straight Big Ten game. Game, EMU. (Wolverine mascot death fight record: 1-2)

11 AM: No. 8 California @ Minnesota

I thought Air Force would give Minnesota a run for their money, and they did. And California could maim Air Force. This will be ugly, Minnesota's not much of a team despite their 2-0 record.

Pick: California. 

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Bear vs. Gopher is a major, major mismatch, and you probably didn't need me to tell you that. Game, California. (Golden Gopher mascot death fight record: 1-2)

11 AM: No. 5 Penn State @ Temple

I hope you guys don't like insightful analysis. Lou Holtz could pick this one. 

Pick: Penn State

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: I generally give the edge to winged creatures, but owls just don't have the same tenacity eagles do, and although they are predators, they normally kill mice. Unlike the mouse, humans don't kill lions by luring them to walk into glue traps, so you can tell the lion will be more difficult for owls to kill. Meanwhile, lions are lions. Game, Penn State. (Nittany Lion fight record: 3-0.)

11 AM: Wofford @ Wisconsin

I scanned Wofford's recent schedules for an embarrassing loss to put in this section, and sure enough, they lost 70-24 against Appalachian State last year, and, uhhh, yeah, they're good and all, but, um, 70 is a lot of points. Wisconsin will get the W. 

My guess as to what Wofford's mascot is, without looking: The eagle. Nah, yo, the Golden Eagle. 

What it actually is: The terrier. That doesn't give me much confidence with regards to their chances in a mascot death fight.

Pick: Wisconsin

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Badgers are surprisingly feisty, whereas terriers are adorable. Game, Wisconsin. (Badgers death fight record: 1-2)

11 AM: Northern Illinois @ Purdue

I really think Purdue is a team that you gotta watch out for. I thought they'd beat Oregon last week, and I don't think they'll be the tenth team in the conference like everybody's predicting. I mean, they're worse than NU, but, still, they'll do alright. 

Pick: Purdue.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: The Huskies beat the Badgers in week one, but they can't beat people. And Boilermakers are people. Game, Purdue. (Boilermakers mascot death fight record: 3-0)

11 AM: #11 Ohio State "@" Toledo, in Cleveland.

Nothing says "Toledo" quite like, uh, Cleveland, so, look for the hometown crowd to carry Toledo to a 56-20 loss. Toledo likes to give up lots of points, and Ohio State likes to score them.

Pick: Ohio State

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Rockets can fly to to the moon. Buckeyes are nuts. Game, Toledo. (Buckeye death fight record: 0-3)

2:30: Michigan State @ Notre Dame.

Yeah, bad loss for Michigan State last week. If they win that game, I can give their lack of a good quarterback, running back, or, like, anything a pass and give them a W here, but, nah. They're not like last year's MSU.

Pick: Notre Dame.  

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Spartans and Fighting Irish like to fight. Except Spartans fight with weapons, and Fighting Irish fight old-timey boxing style. Game, MSU. (Spartans death fight record: 3-0)

2:30: Indiana @ Akron.

Indiana has looked bad against decidedly lower-level teams. Akron is a decidedly mid-level team, and Indiana's first road game of the year.

Pick: Akron.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: After immediately giving the Zips a loss in their first matchup because I didn't know what a zip was, I decided to look it up this week. "Zip" is short for "zipper" because people made clothing with zippers on it in Akron. Their mascot is a female kangaroo. Game, Indiana. (Hoosiers mascot death fight record: 1-2)

2:35: Arizona @ Iowa.

To me, Northern Iowa is to the Hawkeyes as Eastern Michigan is to Northwestern. Both times, a team played way, way, way too close against a team they should have beaten easily. Both times, there was questionable game preparedness and play-calling on the parts of the better team. And both times, the better team won. This is a top 25 team that had a major, major hiccup against their first opponent of the year, and it'll haunt them in the rankings for a while, but it won't haunt them on the field.

Pick: Iowa

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: A preview of the NU-Iowa matchup later this year, my analysis is simple: One's inanimate, one's a cat. Game, Arizona. (Hawkeye mascot death fight record: 0-3)

6: Northwestern @ Syracuse.

This game will be tough. Really tough.

Our defense right now is a mess. Our d-line just got done getting owned by EMU and failing to tackle a guy named Dwayne Priest. Meanwhile, DeLone Carter and Antwon Bailey make a great running back tandem for Syracuse. This is a problem. 

Mike Williams will be playing professional football next year. Sherrick McManis, who might be playing professional football next year, would generally be assigned to guard him, but he's sort of injured. Justan Vaughn, a guy who backs him up, is also injured. Therefore, guys like Jordan Mabin (good) Mike Bolden (hasn't really played) and Ricky Weina (also hasn't really played, but, yeesh) and hordes of others (potentially horrific) will be assigned to guard a preternaturally talented wide receiving beast, getting passes from Greg Paulus, who hasn't looked bad overall in his first few starts, and is learning on the fly. This is a problem.

Stephen Simmons, who has anchored our questionable running game this year, is, in fact questionable this week. This means guys like Arby Fields (ok) Jacob Schmidt (maybe on 3rd-and-two, but nowhere else) Scott Concannon (nope) will be taking snaps. This is a problem.

Mike Kafka has looked just above average. Against Towson and Eastern Michigan. This is a problem.

Our coaches haven't shown any signs that they'd like to call a successful football game. This is a problem.

But at the end of the day, last year, Northwestern rocked Syracuse, and let's look at what changed:

Andrew Robinson, who started at QB for the Orange, is now a backup tight end. He's been replaced by... an ex-Duke point guard. Meanwhile, CJ Bacher, has been replaced by somebody arguably better. This is good for us.

Last year, Mike Williams, didn't play. This year, he will. This is bad for us.

Our defense has looked shaky, but ultimately, is a very similar unit to the one we had last year, and which dominated the Orange. This is great for us.

Again, this isn't very in depth. But at the end of the day, we won by 20 last year, and could have won by more not enough has improved for Syracuse for me to think that we'll straight up lose.

Prediction: Northwestern, 24. Syracuse, 17.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: The Orange are 0-2 against Big Ten opponents in the mascot death fight league, because they are a color. They're still a color. Game, NU. (Wildcats mascot death fight record: 1-2)

My picks last week: 6-5, pretty dismal. In my defense, Air Force, Fresno State, and Purdue came close to making my upset picks come true, but I was too risky. For once, I would've probably done better last week vs. the spread.

Projected Big Ten record this week: 7-3

Projected Big Ten mascot death fight record this week: 6-4. (Overall, 16-16.)

This is Your Quarterback?: An Homage/Hatefest to Greg Paulus. Mainly a hatefest.

This. This is your quarterback?

Greg Paulus would've been one of the least likable players in basketball even if he didn't play for Duke, the least likable team in the country. Duke would be the least likable team in the country even if their coach wasn't Mike Krzyzewski, the least likable basketball coach in the country. And Mike Krzyzewski definitely didn't need Greg Paulus to be the least likable basketball coach in the country. It's a holy trinity of unlikableness, and from here, Syracuse found a quarterback.

I mean, that guy? That guy who slapped the floor and played way way too intense defense to overcompensate for not being very good at it and reminds you in every way of that dicky guy in your pickup game who yells at his teammates and mugs the crap out of you on defense and then turns around and yells AND ONE when he shoots and actually expects you to give him the ball back when he misses saying "BUT I SAID AND ONE YOU FOULED ME" even though you barely even touched him and actually calls charges on people in a pickup game, who went to the school that makes NU look diverse and screams "overprivileged kids from Jersey" that everybody was surprised that their lacrosse team WASN'T going out and raping poor strippers, and whose coach is that arrogant cocky guy whose MO is leading talented teams to underwhelming tourney performances for teams that manage to be worse than the sum of their parts and has a freakin penchant for recruiting top 5 talented players and trying to jam them into his system like square pegs into round holes until they don't have much of a chance at all of being successful at the pro level you should be thankful this isn't a 2,000 word diatribe about the NBA careers of Josh McRoberts and Shelden Williams and/or the likelihood that an athlete like Kyle Singler has anything resembling a good NBA career, the guy who played at that school with that coach, that guy? (I WRITE RUN ON SENTENCES WHEN I'M ANGRY)

That's your quarterback? Man. Jesus. Wow. 

That being said, I'm a bigger basketball fan than I ever have been or will be a football fan. Way bigger. Yeah, I watch baseball in the summer, and my fall weekend afternoons are totally engulfed by football, but they're not ball, they're not the game I was raised on. And when you're 6'2 and still can't touch rim, you grow to develop a hatred of one certain class of people: those who are talented enough to play basketball, but don't really like it that much. (ROT IN HELL, MARK HENDRICKSON!) This is why as much as I love mobile quarterbacks, I sort of hate Terrelle Pryor.  And it even makes me question the GOAT for that 1.5 year stretch where he cast aside the game for some other game which he wasn't good at, realized he wasn't good at it, and came back. 

But on the flip side, I've always considered the rare few who choose ball over football, baseball, or whatever sports they're good at to be near-saints. I loved Charlie Ward as a kid, until I found out he was an anti-semite, and now I only like him. Nate Robinson was a ridiculous cornerback, and at 5'7, it was probably a long shot for him to go pro in basketball instead, and I've always loved him even more for that.

And with this tortuous reasoning, I hate to say this, but I respect Greg Paulus. Yes, he was the absolute bottom of the barrel when it comes to basketball players: he wasn't that great, and he's a complete and utter tool. But he was a great high school basketball player, and a great high school football player, and when he came to that fork in the road, he took the right path, and even if he has a good year and went pro, people will still remember him as a baller, not a quarterback. So, despite all the aforementioned reasons why I really, really dislike Greg Paulus, I honestly have respect for the guy.

That good? Alright, now I can post video of him getting his sh*t handed to him.

I'd say Greg Paulus is the most yammable-on guard I've ever seen. I've seen decent mixes of people getting dunked on for centers whose defensive games revolve around getting blocks, and who have been in the NBA for decades (Shawn Bradley, Theo Ratliff, and Jermaine O'Neal all have targets on their backs, and should really be taught not to jump sometimes), but Paulus, for a guard, who played a little over 100 college games - that's an NBA season and a playoff run - has a legit compilation of videos of him getting absolutely WRECKED by dunkers. (With Onyx as the soundtrack, no less.) For a guard, it's a really astounding level of production. I think it's part of his overanxious defending habits and his dependancy on drawing charges (note he only jumps to try to block Dwayne Collins) that makes it seem like a good idea to try and get in the way of people about to viciously hammer on his head. 

Yeah...

As you could probably tell I've been away from the internet for about two days, so, the crazy amount of posts I had for the Towson and EMU games won't be up for Syracuse this week, but I will have them every other week of the season. I'll have a post up later today, and probably one more, then a game thread tomorrow afternoon, so, stop by.

Also, it appears my advice that you pick Maximilian Leo (WHOSE NAME TRANSLATES TO GREATEST LION FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY) fell on deaf ears. The people elected Syracuse WR Van Chew as Syracuse's best name. Congrats to Van! I'm going to figure out how to make cool graphics for this award, but until then, appreciate the awesomeness that is Van Chew. Here's to him getting a reception tomorrow. 

Comin at you live from Jetblue's JFK Terminal

Yup, I'm headed back to Evanston, finally. I'm not saying "posting on this site might decline a bit because I'll be at college and therefore have things to do and other people to talk to as opposed to the past few weeks where 95% of my friends have left town to go to their colleges and I've been sitting in my room refreshing lake the posts and playing NBA Live 2004," but, yeah, posting on this site might decline a bit because I'll be at college and therefore have things to do and other people to talk to as opposed to the past few weeks where 95% of my friends have left town to go to their colleges and I've been sitting in my room refreshing lake the posts and playing NBA Live 2004. On to some stuff for today.

• Most important news of the day: NU's game on saturday will be on ESPN360, meaning NU gets to go a full season where none of its games are somehow completely off the grid despite the fact that we're in the height of the sports information era. Last year's game vs. Duke was the only Big Ten football game not to get on TV at all in the 2008 season, and it looked like this one would become this year's only one, but we're saved. In even better news, ESPN360 is free at colleges, where college sports are meant to be consumed, something I learned watching the Champions League during class. 
• NU came out with its two-deep for this week a few days ago, and its ever-so-slightly different from the one we had in the first two weeks. First of all, Mike Bolden, a backup corner, is no longer injured, so Justan Vaughn's got company, and it was nice knowing Ricky Weina, but don't expect him to play. Steve Flaherty is officially considered Stefan Demos' backup on kickoffs this week, whereas previously nobody filled that role (I still say he should kickoff all the time to ease Demos' leg) and most notably, Sidney Stewart, who was sick last week, is apparently sick enough that he's been replaced by Demetrius Fields and backup Carl Fisher at his wide receiver slot. Hope he gets well soon.
• The JetBlue terminal here is literally one of the top five nicest places on the planet earth. Free internet access, lounge seating, ridiculous food options, I just ordered a burger with guacamole on it from a touch screen... it's pretty much like if heaven, if heaven was an airport terminal. I'd recommend flying into New York from wherever it is you live, checking out this airport terminal, and then flying back. It's that great.
• I've taken to skimming the NU Rivals boards on occasion just to get a sense of how people are feeling about the program. Anyway, I happened across this post about NU's defensive front seven, and its one of the better pure football analysis posts I've read. NU's front seven obviously performed relatively poorly on Saturday considering the skill level of the opponent, outside of Nate Williams and Ben Johnson on his pick six, but that post makes me somewhat glass half-full about the whole thing. It seems like EMU gameplanned brilliantly and had some excellent, or excessively lucky, playcalls, and that part of this gameplan was to try and outscheme our d-linemen since EMU's o-line gave up a lot talentwise to them. It's a strategy not a lot of tougher opponents will likely try, and since I'm still convinced that we have a fairly talented defensive unit, this post seems to make it seem like some good coaching a game-ready Corey Wootton will do the trick in terms of rehashing a unit that looked pretty poor against EMU.
• And re: the polls. I expected you guys to be a little less homerly after our game last week, but, 22 votes in, 22 of you say NU will win. I guess you guys aren't too concerned.

So, maybe a post later, maybe not, but for now, vote up them polls, son! 

Players on Northwestern's roster...

... picked at random and ranked from least likely to most likely to be upset that saturday's game will prevent them from fully celebrating the Jewish high holy day of Rosh Hashanah:

(just going by names)

David Nwabuisi - 1: least likely to be upset

Demetrius Fields

Stone Pinckney

Jeravin Matthews

Chuck Porcelli

Bryce McNaul

Sidney Stewart

Ben Johnson - 5: could go either way

Jacob Schmidt

Jeremy Ebert

James Kurzawski

David Arnold (sleeper pick)

Andrew Struckmeyer

Aaron Nagel

James Nussbaum - 10: maybe somewhat upset

(by the way, upon brief checking of Nagel and Nussbaum's player profiles, I'm convinced that they won't be upset either. Our roster may very well be jewless.)

That being said, I'm Jewish, and although I'm not extraordinarily religious, I'm definitely disappointed that the scheduling worked out that way - I had the opportunity to go to Syracuse and cover the game, but after much passive-aggressive insistence that I not do this from various more religious family members of mine, I pulled a much less dramatic version of the Koufax and turned it down. Point being, we control the media, and we can't even get football games moved off the high holy days? What gives! (P.S. We do control the media. I'm a Jew at a journalism school, there's a memo, I got it.) Then again, football takes place on saturdays, so, this whole thing would be irrelevant if I was anything more than a moderately religious person.

Most importantly, the whole thing gave me a opportunity to finally make some jew jokes on this site, which I'd been waiting a full three months to do. 

 

(Northwestern Highlights points out in the comments that the game on the holiday is great, because he has an excuse not to go to a holiday dinner, however, I retort that the real purpose of this post is less complaining and more ranking NU football players on Jew potential.)

Name of the Week: Syracuse Edition.

Earlier I said I'd be doing two polls every week. One of them is, as noted, just a simple "who will win on Saturday" poll.

The other is something that I had a sense you guys were liking in my team preview posts(although maybe I was wrong): my ongoing quest to find the best name on the football team of each college we play. So that we have somebody to look for in a sea of players we don't know. Because last week, Lorenzo Seaberry recorded a tackle, and rather than be angry that Stephen Simmons had just been stopped from getting a few more yards, I thought to myself "well, I guess it sucks that Steph got tackled, but if somebody had to do it, I'm glad it was Lorenzo Seaberry III, owner of the second-best name on the Eastern Michigan defense."

So I'll list the nominees, and pick my choice for name of the week, but it's up to you guys to decide who will win the week, and who will end up on the year-ending ballot where the 12 (or 13!) best names we faced off against this season fight for the honor of having the official Purple Drank best name of the year. (I've planned this out, you see. There'll be a trophy presentation or something.)

And yes, I know there's already a Name of the Year blog, which is hilarious, but I feel this serves its own distinct and wonderful purpose for my blog, and therefore don't consider this to be a rip-off, rather, a repurposing of a great idea other people already had. (although tell me in the comments if you disagree.)

So, here it goes: name of the week, Syracuse Orange edition. The poll will be up starting now and will come down friday morning, so, rock the vote. Remember, I'm looking for the best name, not necessarily the funniest, so interpret that as you will.

There are four candidates this week:

CB Shamarko Thomas, #43: Not a particularly great name - he's got a flashy first name, coupled with an unspectacular last name, which rarely works, unless the name is way over the top in a D'Brickashaw Ferguson manner. I'm not a fan, but the name needed mentioning. Thomas, a true freshman, probably won't see the field on saturday, and, in an NU connection, was a teammate of Wildcat freshmen Josh Plasencia and Brian Smith at the IFAF Junior World Cup.

WR Van Chew, #82: Short and to the point, neither of Chew's names are actual names. Van is a type of car, and occasionally comes up as an awesome first name (see: Morrison, Wilder), and Chew is something you do to food before digesting it. His full name is Vanzago, which sounds like a type of cheese. 

On the field, Chew is a sophomore wide receiver who played as a true freshman last year, including a 35-yard touchdown against Pittsburgh.

WR Da'Mon Merkerson, #6: Da'Mon's parents took a relatively boring name in Damon and makes it about four times as great. I'm unsure about how Da'Mon is pronounced - it could still be pronounced like Damon - but I'll go ahead and assume it sounds like "Da Mon", or, how you would call someone "the man" if you were doing a really really inaccurate Jamaican accent.

Merkerson came to Syracuse as a wide receiver, but switched to cornerback for the beginning of last season, recording three tackles against NU, and then switching back to wide receiver by the end of the year, recording one touchdown reception.

And my endorsement in the name of the week election...

Long Snapper Maximilian Leo, #57: First off, that's just fun to say. But that aside, let's examine this name: Most of the time, the double first name is a bad indicator of a human's worth. (I'm looking at you, Greg Anthony!) But generally, these double first names are nothing like Maximilian Leo. Maximilian is one of the best names ever. According to the wikipedia, people named Maximilian generally have one of four professions: Emperor, preferably Holy Roman Emperor, martyr, Robespierre, or fictional character. Leo is thinking outside the box by being a long snapper. Most people with this name probably prefer to be called "Max", but these people are stupid. I didn't take Latin for very long, but I can tell you that Maximilian transfers from Latin to "greatest" and Leo translates from Latin to mean "lion". So this dude's name means greatest lion. GREATEST LION, YO. If I was named that, I'd maul people all the time, and I bet the reason Maximilian is a long snapper is because if he had a more contact oriented role, he'd just start uncontrollably mauling every mofo who got in his way, including teammates, referees, fans, and stray gazelles and wildebeests and stuff.

So those are the candidates. Vote early, choose wisely. I've made my preferences known, but I wouldn't be disappointed with any of the candidates winning, although I do feel it's a relatively weak slate, especially in comparison to the absolute doozy of Minnesota's names (which I just checked, and are absolutely off the hook.) So do it to it, and back your candidate in the comments section.

Tuesday Things

Some stuff:

• Okay, so, first off, I have to acknowledge the fact that I've officially begun to OD on the polls. I've started posting them critters at a rate of like, eight a day, and its too much for them to be meaningful, interesting, or worthy of your votes. To those of you have been voting, thanks, but from here out, the polls will occur regularly, but with a more precise schedule. From here to infinity, this is how we chill: there will be two polls a week. The first will be a simple "who's going to win on Saturday", and will be posted on Monday and left up until Friday at midnight. The other one will be something I'll discuss in a post in a few hours, and judging from the feedback I've gotten so far, I think it's something you'll like.
• I've added another site to the blogroll: Spread Far The Fame, a new blog that's pretty funny and generally impressive. My only issue is that with Ryan from that blog, Ryan from Welsh-Ryan Ramblings, Pat Ryan, Ryan Field, Welsh-Ryan Arena, and Jeff Ryan, I'm confused. So go over there, and check it out. But come back. Please, baby, don't leave.
• NU released its basketball schedule, and its great for people who are allergic to RPI. NU has one away non-conference game (@ NC State)  and two neutral site games (vs. Notre Dame, vs. Iowa State or St. Louis). And that's it. And outside of Stanford and Butler, the teams we play at home are no great shakes, or even good shakes for that matter. With 8 games against non-conference schools with marginal basketball programs, NU is staring down the barrel of a 20-win season if they take care of those games and win a little more than half of the rest.
• If some of the emails in my inbox are correct, than new students arrive on campus today. If you're a freshman, and you're reading this, first off, NERD!, and second off, congrats, and enjoy the heck out of the next week, because its a blast, and then also enjoy the next four years after that, because the 1/4th of it I've gotten through has been pretty good too.

So yeah, I've got two posts for y'all later today, and also, two polls.

Next on the Chopping Block: Syracuse.

Four times this year, and, well, every year, NU plays an out-of-conference opponent. The question arises: who are these guys? Some people only want to know who they are in a football sense, but, to truly understand our opponents on the gridiron, you have to know where they come from, so football strategy can wait. I plan on getting to know these universities a little bit better with posts on each college, mainly with info gleaned from their wikipedia pages.

This week's victim (or not): Syracuse.

This post is going to be a little shorter than the other posts, mainly because unlike EMU and Towson, you've probably heard of Syracuse outside of football. I was gonna apply to Syracuse's journalism program if I didn't get in to Medill, and had my only college interview with a Syracuse admissions person about three days before finding out about whether or not I got into NU. It's probably still the only college interview in the history of college interviews where ex-Knick training camp invitee Demetris Nichols was a prominent topic of conversation. 

Where: Syracuse, NY. You figured this out, right? Something I discovered at college is that people from outside of New York expect residents of New York City to have a good understanding of the goings-on in the rest of New York state, but I have no idea where Syracuse is, unless you consider "upstate" an acceptable answer. 

Size: 'Cuse has 13,203 undergrads, or 1.6 Northwesterns.

Stadium: Syracuse plays both football and basketball games in the Carrier Dome, one of two FBS teams to use the same venue, along with the Idaho Vandals' Kibbie Dome. The Carrier Dome seats 49,000 for football and a preposterous 33,000 for basketball, meaning the average Syracuse basketball game has more in attendance then the average NU football game. You should be crying right now.

Interesting alums: A lot. Syracuse is probably the only school with more sports journalism folks than NU, with Bob Costas, Mike Tirico, Matthew Berry, and, the clincher, the velvety tones of Marv Albert. 

Current NFL Players: There are 17 ex-... uh, Orange, on NFL rosters, and I won't list them all. (Man, this post is boring.) Highlights include Dwight Freeney, Will Allen, and, of course, Donovan McNabb, who played at Syracuse with Marvin Harrison, who no longer is on the tally of current Syracuse players in the NFL. Famous players like Jim Brown, Art Monk, and Larry Csonka played at Syracuse as well.

Current Mascot: Otto, the Orange. It's an orange. A giant freaking orange with arms and legs. The mascot used to be an indian called the "Saltine Warrior", but in 1978, Syracuse was the first school to give in and make their mascot politically correct, and turned him into a Roman warrior, but everybody hated this because it was stupid, so they decided to make it into an anthropomorphic freakin' orange. 

Syracuse's teams, as you probably remember, used to be called the "Orangemen", but, because everybody is way, way, way, way too politically correct nowadays, the school changed the team to the "Orange" because "Orangemen" and "Orangewomen" wasn't gender-neutral and this hurt people's feelings. However, they ignored the fact that this is really stupid, and that now two dudes who played for their teams were now "Oranges" and that team names without "s" are supposed to be in the WNBA and a mild sign that terrorists are winning. 

Mascot if I ran the school: Guess what, decided that these jokes in the previous posts weren't funny, so, hey! Done with it.

Difference between the amount of times this team has been to the NCAA Tournament and the amount of times NU has: Well, this one's definitely less interesting than in the other posts, because Syracuse is, like, great at basketball and everything, and therefore it's not surprising that Syracuse has been 32 more times than NU. They've been to the Sweet Sixteen 18 more times than NU has been to the tourney, the Final Four four more times than NU has gotten to the tournament, and won the championship once, in 2003, behind Melo, Hakim Warrick and Gerry McNamara. 

You could legitimately make a starting five with all Syracuse players that would compete in the NBA: Jonny Flynn, Demetris Nichols looking way out of place at shooting guard, Melo, Hakim Warrick, and Etan Thomas at center. This team would defeat a squad of NU NBA-ers consisting of Evan Eschmeyer in his mid-30's and four Evan Eschmeyer clones by approximately 7,000 points. 

Also, Sherman Douglas made his NBA in 1990, the same year my parents decided to give me the middle name of Douglas, causing me to think that I was named after a solid, but not great point guard for most of my life, despite my dad's repeated insistence that it's just a coincidence that that dude has 2/3 of the same name as me.

Elsewhere in Syracuse sports: Cuse's men's lacrosse team is a little bit like our lacrosse team, except worse: they've won 11 national championships, including the last two, but they've never managed to win more than three in a row, so, yeah, we're not impressed.

Tidbits:

They ran out of hot dogs halfway through day one of shooting: A few years ago, Hollywood people made the decision to make a movie called "The Express" about Ernie Davis, the Heisman-winning running back who led Syracuse to a national championship in 1959 as a sophomore, making great strides for black athletes off the field, only to die of leukemia before ever playing a pro game. Sadly for filmmakers, Syracuse's classical-styled football stadium, Archbold Stadium, was torn down in 1978 to build the Carrier Dome. So they shot the film on location at, where else, Ryan Field, which doubles as Archbold, and, comically, the Cotton Bowl. Directors CGI'd in fans, which is something NU's athletics department really should consider. Not surprisingly, the film was criticized for its historical inaccuracies, mainly the writers completely fabricated a game to show Davis experiencing racial abuse in the south, but I'm sure the fact that they showed a jam-packed Ryan Field didn't help. 

I'll be honest - this is boring the hell out of me, and I can't possibly write any more on this post. Actual football stuff will come later. 

2-0?: The Recap.

First off, thanks to Patrick for playing along and commenting on the game thread yesterday, it was cool to try out, and it'll be back in future. The rest of you who didn't comment get a free pass because you were hopefully all at the stadium, so, be there next time.

I predicted NU would win this game by 38 points. Obviously, I miscalculated.

I believed that NU was a talented enough team to defeat an unheralded EMU team handily without much playcalling diversity, or effort. For two quarters, I was correct. 

I'd like to chalk up the EMU comeback in the second half to lack of focus, painfully predictable playcalling and NU's nagging habit of playing at the level of their opponent, but the truth is, this team has problems that make them seem a lot worse than we thought at the beginning of the year. 

I'm not a doom and gloom guy. I'm pleased with victories, and today, I'm happy. The following is just a list of observations, and, as you'll notice, a lot of them are negative. I have a funny feeling this team will beat Syracuse next week, but a lot of the things here have to improve, or else, quite frankly, they won't.

Coaching: Yeah, we played vanilla, just like we said. This is the last week this year we can afford to do this, clearly. We're not good enough to pull off that trick against FBS opponents, so, the days of running twice as much as we pass are over. Silly playcalling over and over again down the stretch did aid the EMU comeback, and that's fixable.

Defense: WOAH. Wasn't this unit supposed to be one of the best in years? Like last year's, but better?

First off, tackling. It's one of the most fundamental things in football, and the major role of defenders. So it's disconcerting that time and again NU's players were in position to tackle people, and just straight up didn't. That's bad. 

The line looked suspect. And when I say suspect, I mean Eastern Michigan's offensive line handled them. It's the talk of the town that Corey Wootton doesn't look ready, and I have to agree with that assessment. But this is just a weaker unit all-around than it was last year, and I'm not sure why people, including me, expected it to be better in retrospect. Last year, we had three passable defensive ends: Wootton, who was a beast, Browne, who was also, and Mims, who was pretty good. They substituted for each other, and were constantly fresh. And up the middle, we had John Gill, who people actually had to watch out for. Now, all the attention is focused on our ends, and to be honest, we're relatively weak directly up the middle. EMU ran right at our defensive tackles, and did so for about 5.4 yards per rush. EMU's o-line was being touted as extraordinarily week, giving up six sacks last week... and they looked like grown men against the NU d-line.

Nate Williams is a bright spot so far, but our linebacking corps is part of the reason for that 5.4 yards per carry. It's not a good sign that our speedy LB's are being blocked out by o-linemen on their second line of blocks on run plays. Credit where credit is due, Ben Johnson made that one great play, but he's been pretty lackluster outside of that, not to mention that it was thrown right at him through no effort of his own.

Also, it should be noted that we've given up two wide open passes for touchdowns on plays where it looked like there was a miscommunication in which a cornerback stuck with a man and then passed him off to let the safety pick him up on deep coverage... and the safety wasn't there. Vs. Towson, the play just appeared to be a miscommunication between the cornerback and the safety, and it wasn't clear with whom the fault rested. Yesterday, safety Jared Carpenter was supposed to pick up Jacory Stone, but bit on a simple lookaway from Andy Schmitt, and voila, nobody was covering Stone anymore. The miscommunication was acceptable, I guess, when we were up 40 on Towson, but by week two, these sorts of mistakes that allow people to be completely unsurrounded in the end zone are frightening. 

Credit where credit is due: Brad Phillips played great, Jordan Mabin didn't mess up, and Nate Williams seems to have a nose for the ball. Also, I guess you can't ignore the fact that Sherrick McManis didn't play today, but you wonder how much he would've helped.

So yeah. Not many positives on the defensive side of the ball. We shouldn't be giving up 24 points to EMU, we shouldn't be allowing a bottom-tier o-line body us and let their running back go for 130 on us.

Special teams: YO. Outside of punter messiah Stefan Demos' game-winning 50 yarder, about which enough cannot be said, our special teams game was in absolute shambles, throwing away field position and occasionally leaving points on the field. Let's see: 

We had a muffed punt based on miscommunication between the punt returner and the people trying to set up blocking for him, and that cost the Cats seven points.

We had extremely poor coverage on kickoffs: the Eagles had great field position on multiple returns in the first half and needed Demos, aka he who can do no wrong, to make a potential touchdown saving tackle on one return.

We had back to back failures by Brendan Smith to judge the punt and let it roll to the 1- and 2- yard line. 

Again, Demos gets a pass, but we also had some pretty poor punting.

Luckily, all this is special teams stuff is correctable: Smith getting under the ball knocks three of those poorly executed plays off the list, and there's nothing staying in your lanes won't do on kickoff returns. But this special teams play gifted EMU a touchdown, and if uncorrected, will gift another school a victory.

Offense: Our offense didn't look as bad as the other units. Just like on defense, we've got issues in the trenches: our offensive line didn't look particularly great, racking up holding calls left and right.. But they were good last year, so I won't fret.

The era of Mike Kafka the devoted pocket passer is over. Yes, he can throw, but let's be real: to have an effect against opposing defenses, he has to show off the wheels. It's obvious. Today, Kafka out of the pocket looked only good, not great, overthrowing people a bunch and throwing a pick, although the pick wasn't his fault as he got hit on the play.

It's also obvious that we were way overdependent on our running back play today. Now, don't misconstrue that statement: Stephen Simmons looked better than he ever has against FBS opponents, and Jacob Schmidt looked like someone who can actually contribute, especially on short-yardage plays. But we need to throw more often, and on deeper routes. Just to mix it up. We had a plan to not do that yesterday, and it backfired.

In terms of personnel: Scott Concannon will hopefully improve with time, but I think his audition for playing time this year is over, despite a really great opening game against Towson. Arby Fields looked like a freshman, and I guess that will happen, so you can't be mad, but he's not ready for primetime. And I think we're trying to overutilize Josh Rooks and his hands of concrete-like material. 

So, yeah. Obviously, flush it, and come back and win next week, and we can forget this ever happened. The Cats are half-way to what should be their goal every year: sweeping the out-of-conference slate. 

Obviously, there should be complaints: we just nearly blew a game against an extremely week team.

But yo: Stefan Demos hit a game-winning 50-yard field goal. Like it says in the sidebar: this site is about slowing down and enjoying the good things in NU sports. So live life a little, folks. And enjoy watching more football today.

Northwestern, 27, Eastern Michigan, 24.

W!

I'm not going to act like that's a good win. We played a team we were much better than, and then showed we were much better than them by dropping 21 on them in the first half. 

Then, stuff got real. We almost choked away a game against a team that went 3-9 in the MAC last year. We gave up 120 yards rushing to something called a Dwayne Priest. This game is not something to be proud of, and this team has some major, major issues heading into next week.

But at the end of the day, we just got to watch the Wildcats win a game on a last second field goal, and we remembered what it feels like to involuntarily throw your hands up to celebrate a football team scoring. And that's a good thing.

I'll have a detailed game wrap-up either tonight or tomorrow, so, we'll deal with that then. All praise be to Stefan Demos. 

Game Thread: Eastern Michigan vs. Northwestern.

I know, I know, I said I wouldn't do game threads, but I'm trying it out. I have my reasons, punks, so don't ask. Or do. I'll probably answer you. 

First off, you should be at the game, not reading things on the internet. (You still have time to get up and go if you're in the area, folks!). But if you're not, stop by and comment.

I know it probably makes more sense and is much classier to go and comment on LTP, and by all means, go ahead and do so, but I'd like to get a game comment section going. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work, but I'm tryin it. I'd like to get a running commentary going, so, hey, yo, say something, and I'll say something back. 

Before the game, here's some links to other things I wrote about the game, of course, you could just hit the "EMU" label, but, hey. Links.

• Here's an actual preview of this game sort of deal.
  
• Here's a highlight reel of EMU getting handily defeated by Army in one of the top ten depressing college football games I've ever seen a highlight reel of.
• Here's the most in-depth preview of EMU that I could write, which isn't saying much.
• And here's discussion of things nobody really asked about pertaining to Earl Boykins and Domino's Pizza.

Poll results: 59 of you voted, 58 of you think that NU will beat EMU. One of you is either a rogue EMU fan, a reader with poor motor skills trying to vote from an iPhone, or someone absolutely tripping balls right now. Good luck with that, dude.

So, if you feel the need, comment below. I couldn't come up with an intriguing reason for people to comment, so I struck a deal with ex-Towson offensive lineman Jermon Bushrod, currently pictured below. He promised me that for every quarter that you don't comment, he'd murder a helpless animal with a sledgehammer.

He hasn't picked his victim yet, but inside sources tell me he's deciding between a bunny and a month-old Jack Russell Terrier. 

Northwestern vs. EMU, Volume Three: THA RECKONING

So, tomorrow is NU's second game of the year, and, it's against Eastern Michigan. You'd think the talent level of our opponent would increase after playing an FCS school like Towson, but these fellas are only marginally better. Of the 120 teams in the FBS, ESPN's got EMU looking like the 119th, after getting rocked by an equally futile Army team, and at the beginning of the year, the New York Times had them 113th, which was probably a little optimistic of them.

Suffice it to say, that vanilla stuff we found so delicious last week will probably make up most of our arsenal this week again. I'd like to see our playcalling be a little bit more out there - we weren't even blitzing last week - but still, relatively close to the vest. It might be a bummer that NU has such weak opponents to open the year, but on the positive side, the few weeks provide opportunities for us to get game reps in non-pressure situations that allow our inexperienced offensive starters to get some PT together, and we're making the best out of it. 

The injury report lists Jeravin Matthews and Sherrick McManis as "doubtful". I'm thinking these guys are probably not injured that badly, but, to be honest, why bother playing them and risking injury against an opponent like EMU? Justan Vaughn seems pretty talented, so it will be good to see him get a start, so the McManis injury doesn't really hurt us there. Matthews is somehow one of the more known entities out of our running backs crew, and what's more, I think he'll be useful more as a RB/WR hybrid, and his ability to play multiple positions and catch defenses off guard seems like the type of thing that will be more useful the less time he gets now. So that's that.

Last week I said the goal for the week was just to get in and get out, no injuries to starters. I'd say it's pretty much the same this week. I'd like to see our second-string playing in the second quarter, even if the game still is up for grabs. If it is, Kafka and company can come back in at halftime to put it out of reach, as I'm confident they're talented enough to do. But if it's a touchdown or less game, I'd like to see the second unit play, for better or for worse, just to see how they handle it. I'd like to see Dan Persa lead us on a scoring drive when the opposing defense is still in it to win it, and I'd like to see a big stop by like, I dunno, Purple Drank favorite defender Stone Pinckney to keep NU in the lead, a sort of baptism-by-fire sort of deal. That would be nice, and I'm convinced Fitz will bring in bench guys to play early regardless of the score.

Now, on to the gameplan. 

Offense: Again: we know Mike Kafka can run. However, he's sort of our starting quarterback, and I don't want to see him getting injured this early in the season. So if I were him, I'd set a reasonably attainable goal for tomorrow: don't get tackled. We have a sturdy o-line, so he shouldn't have to worry about sacks. If he runs the ball on a scramble, he should slide down, as he's been unwilling to do in the past because of his wheels, or end up out-of-bounds or in the end zone. And if he runs an option, pitch it, something he seemed a little bit scared of doing against Towson. Kafka did a great job of passing last week, but he still didn't stick around in the pocket long enough to suit my likings - I'd like to see him just chill out back there for once, just to show that he can.

Persa as noted, I hope gets some serious tick, more than just the two throws he had last week.

At running back, we've got some unsolved issues still after the first week. I'd like to see more of what we saw last week, which is pretty much just everybody getting their fair share of carries. I'd like to see if Jacob Schmidt could emerge as a third-down back sort of carrier, and if Scott Concannon is worth anything. And I'd definitely like to see Jeravin Matthews stay on the sidelines, because he doesn't need to risk it. The running game should get a little bit more inventive this week - last week, we shied away from runs outside the tackles and options for pretty much the entire game once it got out of hand - and that was no fun. I'd still like to see the running game get the bulk of the playcalls, but, I'd like these playcalls to be more like the ones we'd see in a Big Ten game. Not just dashes up the gut, although we do have to keep those in the offense.

I liked the spread of the ball to various WR's last week, and expect the same. Nobody did anything spectacular except Brewer, and, with what will hopefully be another relatively small passing sample size, it would be unlikely to expect anyone besides Brewer to rack up a big game. I know this week will probably rightly be a vanilla attack, but, I'm dying to see Brewer pull a Peterman-esque end-around pass. I know it can work for another touchdown this year if people aren't expecting it, so, maybe it can wait a few weeks, but I'm anxious. 

Defense: As noted, this Schmitt fella is a bit of a gunslinger, even with the non-hurl-it-80-times-a-game offense EMU has this year. I want our secondary to get their grown man on and play like they should've last week. I foresee three picks, and that's being conservative.

Corey Wootton was barely a factor last week, and this week, he and Vince Browne go up against an o-line that gave up 6 sacks for a loss of over 50 yards last week. LTP has said this all week, but these two also have to get their grown men on, and I want to see Corey legitimately play this week whereas last week he just got a few series and called it a day. This year, opposing o-lines will be hurling as much of their manpower as they can at him, and if he can't overcome that this week against EMU, he won't be able to overcome it in the Big Ten season. Not to mention that Browne should be absolutely teeing off against minimal opposition on the other side. 

People I'm watching:

Corey Wootton. Corey was my person to watch last week, and he barely set foot on the field, so, I haven't taken my gaze off of him yet.

Arby Fields: is he really our best running back? He'll have the opportunity to prove he is this week, and I think he will.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: this is a classic battle of fearsome land predator vs. fearsome air predator. As is generally the case in this type of battle, it's a mismatch: the cat is unable to attack the eagle unless the eagle comes to him first, therefore, the eagle is perennially on offense. Game, EMU. (Wildcat mascot death fight record: 0-2.)

Prediction:

Eastern Michigan, 7, Northwestern 45. Fitz will be less relenting than he was last week against Towson, but the opponent will be slightly better, so I foresee roughly the same score. The only difference is that I expect our defense to be a little bit more on top of themsleves after the coaching staff got surprisingly mad at them for allowing two touchdowns against Towson. I expect the Eagles to flukily push one across on a deep pass that manages to go unintercepted, but generally, this will be a romp for NU.

We're 1-0, and we're trying to go... 1-0 again. Is it okay that I find coach-speak fun to buy into sometimes?

Go Cats, yo. 

some quick site stuff

Got an EMU prediction/gameplan post coming up momentarily, but, just figured I gotta get some quick things out of the way.

First off, since I'm a journalist and hate putting out wrong stuff, I feel like pointing out that some of the stuff I wrote in the first EMU post about attendance issues at Eastern Michigan was sort of off, so much so that jhodges did me a favor and commented with more precise information, so, check that out.

It appears I missed some decent EMU names, and I'm proud of my readership for scouting out rosters. The DeMaster brothers, Dan and Kyle, have honorable mention-worthy names, as pointed out by an anonymous commenter. Honorable mention-worthy: they're no competition for the 1-2 punch of Paopao and Lorenzo Seaberry III. (And, yes, I've already picked out the winner for Syracuse.)

I added another blog to the blogroll on the right: Craig Moore's, which, at first, I thought would just be another one of those "hey, I'm an athlete with a computer!" joints which features compelling post titles like "Big game today!" and "Tired after practice", and didn't feel like I needed to link to it. But Craig's got it goin on. I rarely laugh at things on the internet, but I actually did chuckle at his "my shot is like a nice girl" line. He's already well on the road to surpassing Rod Benson as the world's best minor-league basketball player blogger, but I think he needs to pump out some rap music to get to the top.

The NU vs. EMU poll closes at midnight, so, if you haven't voted, and don't want EMU to pull out a come-from-55-behind poll victory in the late hours of the night tonight, go over to the right side of the page and do that.

A bad omen

Like any true blooded American, I watched a little bit of the Steelers/Titans matchup last night.

Anyway, at one point, I heard Al Michaels mention that Jason Jones was absolutely working Trai Essex. In fact, I hadn't noticed it, but Jones, the Titans' defensive end, was matched up against Essex, the Steelers' starting right guard. This was such an important matchup that the Observer-Reporter, a southwest Pennsylvanian paper, chose to highlight it as the thing to watch for in the game. And sure enough, Jones had just beasted around Essex for a 19-yard sack of Ben Roethlisberger.

The upshot of this? Jones, a second round draft pick in last year's draft, went to Eastern Michigan. Essex, on the other hand, is an NU grad, and still probably the only person in NU history named "Trai". 

The upshot of that, of course, is that we're playing EMU tomorrow, in football, which is the sport Essex and Jones were playing.

My advice? Panic. Stock up on perishable goods and tape your windows and all that good stuff. In terms of omens, the sack by an EMU DE against an NU o-lineman two days before those schools play is the equivalent of opening a ladder indoors because you need to protect yourself from falling shards of glass from a mirror you just broke that was being held by a black cat on a ladder that you're walking under. 

If you don't have a bomb shelter, start digging. 

Brendan Smith Memorial Picks: Week 2.

Do you guys care who I think is going to win other Big Ten games? What's that? No?

Well, tough. There's nothing else to blog about on thursdays.

(all times central, which means as a New Yorker I'm doing math over here.)

11 AM: Western Michigan @ Indiana

The polar opposites of our opponent this week made Michigan look pretty good last week, but Indiana is a hulking pile of badness. This game is bad. Linkin Park bad. I still like the Hoosiers to pull out a win, but it will be competitive down the stretch.

What I would guess Western Michigan's mascot is, without looking: The Broncos? I had this one last week.

What it actually is: DING DING DING DING DING! I won't actually count this as an official correct guess since I had them last week. But I'm still impressed.

Pick: Indiana.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: One of the more competitive mascot matchups yet: On the one hand, bucking broncos can and do kill people, but on the other, you've got Barbaro. (too soon?) But I gotta go with the broncos: they're difficult to tame, while people from Indiana don't seem particularly intimidating to me. Game: Western Michigan. (Hoosier mascot death fight record: 0-2)

11 AM: Central Michigan @ Michigan State.

Central Michigan looked like a good MAC team heading into the year, but lost to Arizona pretty brutally. MSU on the other hand, looked like pretty good. They probably scheduled this thinking it would be an easy win, and it will be.

Pick: MSU.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: the Chippewas are going to come at the Spartans with a fighting style they're not used to, which might throw them off a bit, but when it comes down to it, Sparta is a military machine which any groups of soldiers would have trouble defeating, unless they have guns. Game, MSU. (Spartan mascot death fight record: 2-0.)

11 AM: Syracuse @ No. 7 Penn State.

The Orange looked good against Minnesota, but this ain't Minnesota. 

Pick: Penn State.

Pick to win in a mascot fight to the death: The ruling I made last week is that orange, as a color, is incapable of dying, and therefore, shouldn't be allowed in the mascot death fight club. Game, Penn State. (Nittany Lion mascot death fight record: 2-0.)

11 AM: Fresno State @ Wisconsin.

Fresno State played Wisconsin close last year, losing 13-10, and that was when Wisconsin was, you know, good. Last week, Fresno State won a tuneup by 51, while Wisconsin got by against NIU, 28-20. This one will be closer than that, a genuine toss-up. By the way, I'm really low on Wisconsin this year.

Pick: Fresno State

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Last week, the Badgers had a tough loss against the Huskies, and they face a similar mascot death fight this week against another canine foe in the Bulldogs. A similar mascot death fight with a similar result. I'd like the Badgers in a fight against a smaller dog, like a chihuahua or a dachshund, but Huskies and Bulldogs have too much grit and strength to fall to the tiny, rodent-eating carnivore. Game, Fresno State. (Badger mascot fight death record: 0-2)

11:05 AM: Iowa @ Iowa State.

Both struggled with FCS opponents: Last week Iowa State gave up 17 points to North Dakota State, and Iowa gave up 16 to Northern Iowa. The difference is that Iowa State also scored 34 points, while Iowa only scored 17. My instinct is telling me that Iowa just had a bad game and will revert to something close to last year's form soon, but common sense is telling me that they'll lose to ISU on the road.

Pick: Iowa State.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: I'm still unclear on what a hawkeye is. Is it someone with great vision? Is it the disembodied eye of a hawk? Until I get an explanation, this team will have trouble winning mascot death fights. Game, ISU. (Hawkeyes mascot death fight record: 0-2.)

2:30 PM: No. 18 Notre Dame @ Michigan

This game is so annoying.

Pick: Michigan.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Even the most Fighting of the Irish would have trouble against a ravenous wolverine, and unfortunately, the fisticuff enthusiast leprechaun in Notre Dame's logo looks like it stands even less of a chance, magical leprechaun abilities aside. Game, Michigan. (Wolverines mascot death fight record: 1-1.)

6 PM: Air Force @ Minnesota

I have this image of Mike Kafka running for 217 yards last season, and I have this image of Air Force wreaking havoc on Minnesota with their "we're a service academy and therefore we feel compelled to run a completely option based offense" state of mind. Squeaking by Syracuse didn't help. 

Pick: Air Force.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: I think falcons probably eat gophers in real life, so this isn't a good matchup. Game, Air Force. (Golden Gophers mascot death fight record: 1-1.)

6 PM: Illinois St. @ Illinois.

Analysis: I'ma stop analyzing the ones that are like "derivative of state vs. state", because, even in cases like Northern Iowa vs. Iowa where it could be close, is anybody going to predict it being close?

What I would guess Illinois State's mascot is, without looking: the Indians. (In retrospect, probably not very likely, cuz of the whole politically correct thing, but it sounds right.)

What it actually is: The Redbirds.

Pick: Illinois. 

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Redbirds, presumably cardinals, are tiny and harmless. It would be a difficult kill for a Fighting Illini, but an inevitable one. Game, Illinois. (Illini mascot death fight record: 1-1.)

7 PM: No. 3 USC @ No. 8 Ohio State.

People seem to be giving OSU a chance in this one. At this point in world history, even with Terrelle Pryor being an absurdly talented athlete, probably the one quarterback I would like for my college football team if I were building one from scratch, I just see USC and Ohio State being in different leagues right now. I'd give OSU ten points in this one and still expect them to lose.

Pick: USC.

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Buckeyes are nuts, folks. I don't see them winning a mascot death fight all year long, whether they're poisonous or not. Game, USC. (Buckeyes mascot death fight record: 0-2.)

9 PM: Purdue @ Oregon.

A lot of people probably see the Boilermakers making it close after last week's Duck debacle. I see them winning.

Pick: Purdue

Pick in a mascot fight to the death: Have you ever played Duck Hunt? Boiler manufacturing engineers have. With real guns. And real ducks. Game, Purdue. (Boilermakers mascot death fight record: 2-0.)

Totals, excluding yet-to-be-picked NU vs. EMU:

Projected Big Ten record in Week 2: 5-5.

Projected Big Ten mascot death fight record in week 2: 5-5. (on the year: 10-11)

My picks last week: 10-1. Admittedly, the early season is a little easy going, but this week I went a little bit out of the box I think, so we'll see.

Gettin Familiar With: EMU Football.

I told y'all about EMU, now lets read about their football team. 

(Oh, and, if you want shorter posts, tough.)

Historically vs. NU: The Eagles and the Cats have two meetings, in 2006 and 2007, one at Ryan Field, and one at Detroit's Ford Field. NU won the '06 game 14-6 on the strength of running touchdowns by, oddly enough, quarterbacks Mike Kafka and Andrew Brewer, and the '07 game was a 26-14 win led by 361 yards passing by Mike Kafka and 122 on the ground from Omar Conteh. Still remaining on the squads that played then are Kafka and Brewer (who combined to go 16-26 with 110 yards and a Kafka pick through the air), QB Andy Schmitt, who went 3-9 as a backup in '06, EMU starting running back Dwayne Priest, who had four yards for 19 carries as a backup in the 07 game, and stud EMU wideout Jacory Stone, who caught 8 passes for 85 yards at Ford Field. The starting QB for EMU in '07, Kyle McMahon, is now the backup, which probably disappoints any of you who remember his 28-48 three pick, no touchdown performance.

Hard Times: EMU hasn't experienced a winning season since a 6-5 campaign in 1995, and didn't have one since 1989 before that. Against Big Ten teams, they're a remarkable 0-15, and 0-14 on the road, with the Ford Field game being the only time the Eagles have "hosted" a Big Ten opponent. 

Overview: EMU, like Towson, isn't a very good football team. They, like Towson, went 3-9 last year, although against a higher caliber of opponents. (except Indiana State, who they beat 52-0. Towson could probably manhandle them.) They showed some offensive promise scoring 108 points in the last two games of the season, with Andy Schmitt throwing for exactly 1000 yards between the two games while throwing eight touchdowns and only one pick (and rushing for three more!) but on the flip side, they gave up 107 points in those games. This year, their extreme spread offense is gone, and they didn't start off well by dropping their home opener to an Army team that also went 3-9 last season. New coach Ron English look promising, but, progress takes a while, and it won't be happening this year with a team with a new coach, new coordinators, and seven new position coaches. Also, "promising" in regards to EMU is a mid-place MAC finish in a few years, so, that doesn't mean much.

Sense the Depression: EMU's marketing slogan for this football season is thus: "Embrace the Process." That's near starving puppy on the sadness level. I don't think I've ever seen a marketing slogan acknowledge that the team is in the midst of a giant ocean of suck, and that it will take years to get out of. 

This tells you more about EMU's team than the following several thousand words, so, skip it if you wanna. 

Offense: As noted, Schmitt had some serious stuff going on in those last two games of the season, averaging 500 yards passing and scoring 11 TD's. Well, it was a little fluky: take away his two nova games (in which, it should be noted, he threw 156 times) against Temple and Central Michigan, and in the other ten games, Schmitt was 153-261 for 1648 yards with seven touchdowns and seven picks. Luckily for Schmitt's arm of going Kerry Wood on him, the Eagles have slowed down their pace, as coach English has installed a more pro-style offense, meaning he only threw 31 times against Army, completing 18 for 183 yards with a TD and two picks. 

The running back is Priest, who was a backup RB in last year's "pass until Schmitt's arm falls off" offense up until this year, but still managed about 500 career yards. He looked decent against Army, carrying 19 times for 83 yards and a TD. However, the team only had 40 yards rushing total because of some pretty poor pass protection leading to a bunch of sacks. 

On offense, the person to watch will be Jacory Stone, a wide out who is on the Biletnikoff award watch list. (Then again, 17% of Americans are on a college football award watchlist, including one of my aunts.) Stone led the team in receiving yards and receptions last year, and had a pretty nice 25-yard grab against Army which you saw in all its pixellated glory on the video I posted today. 

The offensive line is sieve-like, allowing seven sacks against Army for a loss of 53 yards, meaning that pretty much one in every five times they dropped into pass protection, they failed, and I'd bet there were a decent amount of hurries with numbers like that. 

Overall, not an impressive unit to me. A quarterback with two impressive games that account for about a third of all his career stats is not, as many previewing this game will say, the sign of a dynamic offense. It's a unit adapting to a new system under a new coach and a new coordinator, and, with the pasta strainers up front on the o-line, not much will get done.

Defense: Defense? Pshh. The team gave up 35.33 points per game last year in the MAC, and when you remember that one of those was a 52-0 romp over Indiana State, who have lost 52 of their last 53 games, that becomes even less impressive. This is a team that nearly lost both of those games in which Schmitt was busy breaking the laws of physics by throwing 80 times a game, allowing 55 points against Temple and then 52 in the win over Central Michigan. 

People will pass off Army's 300 yard rushing game this past weekend as a fluke because Army runs a crazy triple-option running attack that will make any defense's rushing stats look bad. But consider that EMU gave up 341 on the ground to Akron last year, in a game where the Zips also passed for over 200 yards. This is a really, really weak defense. 

The new coordinator, Eric Lewis, has never had a coordinating gig - for the record, his offensive counterpart, Ken Karcher, has held head coaching jobs and offensive coordinating jobs at multiple levels - so this defense won't get better right away. On the plus side, they have DB Johnny Sears, who transferred to EMU after being kicked off of Michigan, so he's clearly got talent (although this blog documenting his departure from Michigan notes that he was "really bad", and the commenters agree), and he hasn't gotten into the starting lineup yet. Senior DE Brandon Downs looks to be the leader of the defensive unit after getting ten tackles and two sacks against Army. However, the "star" of the defense is Jermaine Jenkins, whose listed position is... "star". The team's depth chart for the front seven shows three d-linemen, three linebackers, and Jenkins, who is neither here nor there. He's listed as a linebacker on the team roster, but I guess in actuality he plays on the line occasionally, allowing the team to vary 4-3 and 3-4 sets without having to switch in and out defenders.

Transitive Property Logic that leads me to believe that we'll win by a lot:

9/27, 2008: Northern Illinois, 37, Eastern Michigan, 0.

8/30, 2008: Minnesota, 31, Northern Illinois, 27.

11/22, 2008: Iowa, 55, Minnesota, 0.

9/27, 2008: Northwestern, 22, Iowa, 17.

Transitive Property Score Differential: 101.

(By the way, I obviously could've gone straight to Minnesota to NU, since we beat them, but... I figured adding the extra 55 points made this whole thing more convincing, right?)

All Name Team: Pretty strong competition on the Eagles, but I narrowed it down to four runners-up and a winner. 

Runners-up, listed in ascending order of name goodness: There's junior offensive lineman Bridger Buche (Bushy?), redshirt freshman wide-out L'Shane Bynum, true freshman wide-out Kinsman Thomas (The fact that Kinsman is third really attest to the deepness of this name class), and, in a shocking second place finish, senior linebacker Lorenzo Seaberry. First off, it should be noted that Lorenzo is my second favorite name, (behind Marcus) because you can be either an Italian renaissance statesman or a member of N.W.A. with that name. I swear, my child will be named either Marcus or Lorenzo. But moving on, Seaberry's full name is Lorenzo Seaberry III, which is an astoundingly great name, and sounds like something I'd say my name was if I was prank calling someone as a pretentious wasp character but hadn't bothered to think up an actual name until the person actually asked what my name was, and I had to come up with it really quickly on the spot.

Winner: Junior linebacker Nate Paopao, who has one of the best football names I've ever heard. Nate is a juco transfer, and thanks to the EMU official pronunciation guide, we can find that his name is pronounced "POW-POW", the only name to get the all-caps treatment. Nate has six siblings, all of whom manage to have better names than him, but I won't drag them into this, because they don't deserve to google themselves only to find that somebody's writing about them on the internet, so, find his roster page to see for yourself. 

However, if a member of the Paopao family does read this, let it be known that you have phenomenal taste in naming, and like I said in the last post, this isn't about humorous names as much as it is about classy names that make me want to sip expensive scotch and smoke cigars and discuss how great your family's names are in a well upholstered room with a fireplace. Hope you appreciate. I also hope you download the "Pow!" application for the iPhone, where you punch the air and a cartoon punching sound effect is made, because if you do it twice really fast, it's like your name.

Bam-Bam shoulda been called Paopao.

So how do we play them?: We could play them the same way we played Towson and win. It's as simple as that. For the game to be as big a margin of victory, we'd have to actually call multiple plays inventively and blitz, or maybe even do basic things like stunt linemen or spend the entire second half running in between the tackles, but let it be known that we probably won't need to to win. I hope we do, though, because those things are fun. 

If I had to give a team-specific instruction, it would be that we need to watch for the deep ball to Jacory Stone, but, quite frankly, we don't need to, and we'll still win. I'll give a gameplan in my friday post like I did last week.

So that's EMU football. Embrace the process. 

Ever wonder what an EMU football game looks like?

Here's your answer: a highlight reel of the Eagles' game 27-14 loss to Army on Saturday.

Judging from the video, EMU will be the most pixellated team Northwestern has faced since our 2001 matchup against the Goombas from the Super Mario Bros video game for the original NES, and we all remember how that turned out.

One of the many sacks by the goomba d-line that caused NU's quarterbacks to jump off the screen while flailing their arms.

Besides the low video quality and cliché music selection (which I still find cool in conjunction with NU videos, for some reason), you can take things away from the video. 

First off, seeing that whole messed up Army triple-option thing shows you that the way Army gained yards on the ground is a lot different from the way NU will attempt to, so EMU's rush defense isn't as weak as the stats would make them seem. They still look pretty bad though.

On the other hand, Andy Schmitt, who put up rather gaudy stats last year out of an extreme spread offense, looks like a gunslinger of the Rex Grossman variety, getting a lot of air under passes he probably shouldn't be throwing in the first place, but, he does, and it led to EMU's only two touchdowns of the day. He throws four long balls in the clip, and I like to think that Mabin n Mcmanis make those four throws into three picks and a knockdown, whereas Army turned it into two picks and two long completions. Either way, those two should be preparing for loads of deep balls (pause) out of the gun, but, then again, they'll probably be taking a nice long rest during the second half against an opponent of this caliber, so they shouldn't be too worried.